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Kev Watches Bellator 97

People ask us all the time (us being myself and my slightly Mexican-ier Verbal Tap cohort, Raf) what it's like for us when a guest and a friend of the podcast fights?  As some of you may know, David Rickels was a guest on the show recently and talked with us about this very fight on our podcast.  And as a subjectively unobjective viewer, I decided to show you what that viewing process looks like. So here, for your viewing pleasure, is a complete GIF and Photo Review of me (Kevin) watching fellow Kansan, David "The Caveman" Rickels take on Michael "I'm drawing a blank right now... what's his fight nickname again?" Chandler at #Bellator97.

In case I wasn't clear enough earlier, I think it's easy to tell who I'm rooting for here just based on nickname recognition. (And spoiler alert: things didn't go great).


Bellator 97

And the night begins... First fight I watch: King Mo vs. Jake Noe. Or "MoNoe" as I like to call it.

Noe was not prepared for this beast

Fight over.  King Mo makes Noe... NoeMo' (get it?). 

As in: This fight ends when King Mo hits Noe so hard, he can't take "NoeMo!"

Pun work aside, time to restock for Rampage's announcement.

And now, a glimpse into my mind: What was I thinking when Rampage Jackson made his "special announcement?"

Rampage vs. Ortiz

“Rampage has to be high right now!  But I can appreciate this pro-wrestling style call out.  Oh wait, he's literally CALLING OUT his opponent.  So we all have to wait and see!  Who is it, who is it?!  I hope I’ve heard of him!  AHHHH, I can't see shitmaybe I need to get my eye's checked, it has been two yearsHOLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY BALLLLLLSSSS ITS FUCKING, wait, is that Tito?! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLY BALLS it is Tito Ortiz!!! GO BELLATOR!.....Must.  Call.  Raf!”

(...and Scene!)

Get Excited!

Askerin vs. Koreshkov

NEXT FIGHT! Lets go Askren! I'd like to ASKren if you can end this quickly, please, so we can get to the main event!  

[Seven Minutes Later]: Well, the fight is technically still going on....

"Please end this fight" Said EVERYONE WATCHING! "No" said the Referee, "he's intelligently defending the floor!"

UHH! FINALLY this thing over.  Now bring on the Beast!


"Too the windows, too the wall"

Time for a little double fisting good luck ritual! ("Double Fisting" is hard to write with a straight face)

and.... here we go!

oh uh...





now please be respectful as Kevin goes through the five stages of grief....

1. Denial 2. Anger 3. Bargaining 4. Depression Not quite ready for acceptance.... 5. Back to Depression 6. Acceptance

On a serious note: Congrats to Michael Chandler.  That was a really amazing performance.  And I have no doubt Caveman will be back.  And so will I.  Until next time, fight fans.



Raf Watches: Fight Master (Episode 1)

Welcome to my "Best Of" recap of last night's The Ultimate Fi, I mean The VoiceI mean, Spike TV's original fighting reality show concept, Fight Master!  If you didn't watch it, don't worry, I do all the heavy lifting.  And if you did watch it, I hope you enjoy these shitty jokes I wrote about it.   Without further ado...



































Check back next week to see what dumb jokes I have in store for all of you. Peace!

Oh, by the way, if you like this, check out my jokes for the Bellator MMA fights that preceded the premiere of Fight Master here.



Raf Watches: Bellator MMA

We know sometimes things get lost in the Twitter-sphere during fight nights, that's why we here at VERBAL TAP are proud to present a collection of the notes and observations we occasionally make during fight nights.  Here, just in case you missed it, for your viewing pleasure is Raf's take on last night's Bellator MMA fights.
































You're welcome, @SeanWheelock.

That'll conclude my recap of last night's Bellator.  For my jokes on Fight Master go to this page



Fight Master Promo

Ever watched a promo for The Ultimate Fighter and thought, "man, I wish this looked and felt a lot more like The Voice?"  Well then you're gonna love this trailer Spike TV has put up for their "definitely not Ultimate Fighter, but probably really similar no matter what we do" show, Fight Master. I would love to talk to the person who thought it'd be a great idea to have Randy Couture, Frank Shamrock, Greg Jackson, and Joe Warren all look like they're in a luxury suite of a TapouT casino(tm) and have fighters brought to prove themselves in front of them.  The only thing missing in this promo to complete the look is a bottle whiskey and cigars.

But hey, it's not exactly like The Ultimate Fighter, the choice is yours... Well, not yours.  But the fighters.  They choose their own coach (again, The Voice) and their opponent (you mean fighters weren't primarily picking who they wanted to fight on The Ultimate Fighter recently?  News to me).

I'll overlook the name for the time being (Fight Master... really?  That sounds like a B-action flick that even Brian Bosworth passed on).  The choose your own coach aspect has some potential ("So Randy Couture, what exactly can you offer me?"), but it also feels a little gimmicky.  We at VERBAL TAP are huge fans of fights, so I'll reserve judgement on just about anything else until we see the first set of prelims.

But if you want to meet the cast, check out the video below.  There's 32 of them.  One of them does a backflip.  That's about all I know so far.

There are also plenty of Twitter handles in the video so you can stalk them all.

So go forth and do good work now, internet!